Cambion; Keaira looked after me when mummy attacked me. Even though I probably cause so much trouble for everyone, he still says he cares about me. Although, It does make me wonder how much longer it will take before he has finally had enough of me and casts me aside. I really want to go back and live with Ciel, but I'm worried that mummy, Lecea or Sebastian will go after Jazz. Rather than living in the manor with angel half-breeds, and idiots like Lecea, I could have a flat of my own next to Keaira. Anyone wouldn't expect me to turn the offer down. I'm not going to say no. London city doesn't sound too bad... Our own little flat, for me and Jazz to stay in.  Vermin has even replaced me back at home as well, they're everywhere. Everywhere apart from here, with Keaira. You're going to keep it that way right, Keaira? Outside space like the countryside  may be a little limited out here, but Jazz could get used to it. Unfortunately, I guess this decision counts as me being an idiot and Ciel's going to hate me again for picking Keaira over him, but he really needs to understand that mine and Jazz's safety comes before his ridiculously high standards of what he expects from me...

Elias; You spoke to me yesterday, and told me not to leave you, and that gave me the inspiration to work even harder to make these perfect for you, Princess. I'll never leave you unless you make it one hundred percent clear you want me gone. I hope you like them....

Elias; I don't think things are going too well, you're still too depressed. Me and Denzel made some cookies in hopes of giving you something nice and appealing to eat, considering you refuse to come out of your room to even feed yourself. Pink sugar cookies. They're pretty to look at, just like you are. 


Denzel said you refused to eat them because I had made them. It kind of hurts to hear that. I can't do anything to help you because you wont let me... If only I could do something to cheer you up just a tiny bit. Also, I'd like it very much if you'd help by looking after Denzel a little more before you accuse me of taking Nameless's place as a parent. I don't want that, either. If he's upset, he comes to me because you wont talk to anyone. 


Maybe I'll have to try and cheer you up even more with my baking skills. Butterfly cookies perhaps?... 

Denzel; I went out the other day to ask people if they had seen my mummy anywhere. I had no luck.  I was on my way back home when I came across this guy, so I decided to ask him as well. He said he hadn't seen mummy, but would come and tell me if he found anything out. I told him where I lived, and still he pronounced the name wrong. Phantomhive, not Faggothive. Maybe he has something wrong with him where he can't say certain words right, because I don't understand how you can make a mistake like that...


We spoke for a very short time before he told me that my blood smelt nice. I was confused. Why would he need to tell me that? He smelt different himself... Then he shouted at me. He told me to run, and that is exactly what I did. I panicked. This man, he caught up with me very quickly and attacked me. I was pinned up against the wall, while he bit my neck. It hurt quite a lot and I got very scared and started to cry. That was when something different happned. I turned into something... that didn't seem like me. Demon forms are scary too. That was when the man let me go. Then my arm started to hurt a lot. I think he broke it. I wanted someone to come and help me, but that never happened. I stayed down on the ground until the pain went away and I was able to pick myself up and run back home. 


Don't talk to strangers? I don't even want to go outside again... I'm terrifed. I need my mummy to give me a cuddle and to tell me eveything will be okay. That's what they're supposed to do right? Not run away...

Alois; 'Good. It's so lonely at home now without him around, and I haven't seen him in a long time.'


Damn you Mello for messing up my bloody garden! You've made it attract little girls....


I went to let the dog out yesterday, only to find my grandaughter, Aurelei planting seeds in my garden. She didn't think it looked very nice. Well, it did look acceptable before Mello started acting like a dog, digging up all my pretty flowers. It's his fault it now looks like crap.


What surprised me most about yesterday, was that I stood talking to Aurelei for quite a while, and I was being.... nice to a girl. Seriously, I really must be getting old, wanting company from almost anyone. My children have grown up and left home, I don't have sex much, I spend a lot of my time walking the dog or doing gardening while my husband sits around all day reading newspapers. Don't get married, it makes you boring! 


On the plus side, I did have sex yesterday for the first time in a month, and I figure it was well worth the wait. I feel great accomplishment. See, going without sex for a month is easy, Ciel. You horny bastard. Oh, oh! I hope to see Keaira soon. He needs to get his ass down here before me and Malphas start shouting at biscuits over tea like a real old pair of crazy fools... We need more of a social life.

Denzel; Why did you have to leave, mummy? We need to be a proper family. You have to come back. Everyone is so upset without you here.

We need you. I need you...

Cambion; People need to stop dumping their babies or losing them. Although...if the baby is an angel, I can see why you'd want to get rid of it. However, do the world a favour and drown it. Don't leave it for someone else to find. ...Actually, I don't think it's possible to drown an angel, but still. Jazz found one, a baby. I don't really know what she's going to do with it, but my suggestion was obviously the best one. I wonder what mummy would do with it...


The treehouse Jazz made is pretty much done, and it looks awesome. She also bought my chocolate back from my old house, however a fair amount of it has gone missing. I blame my parents, good for nothing... Ugh. That was mine, you bastards. On the plus side though, apparently Ajax is doing fine, and that makes me very happy, although I do miss him terribly. That is the only thing that I hate about not being able to go back. I had to leave my poor doggy behind.


I think that I may have come up with Lecea's punishment for hurting Ciel. I care about Ciel, and Lecea hurt him...try and guess what I am going to do. I'm not going to expect Lecea to just stand there while I do this, so I'm glad I made this contract. Jazz is my shield incase this all backfires. I just hope Ciel doesn't care about what I am going to do, or I am going to be in even more trouble with him and I don't want that. I hate being locked outside. I'm going to have to think of something to make everything up to him. Chocolate and flowers isn't going to be enough. I want a cuddle from Ciel...I haven't had one of those in a long time.

Elias; I never wanted it to turn out like this for you. Because of me, you have been broken up with. I'm very sorry, but I couldn't get Nameless to stay, Princess. He put his wedding ring on my finger and said it suited me better. I disagree. You picked Nameless, and that's the way it should stay. If you wanted me, then you wouldn't have got married to him in the first place. I've accepted that. You two breaking up isn't something I had hoped for. I feel terribly guilty, and what's worse is that I'm the one that is going to have to tell you that Nameless has left your side. I'd rather not be the one to tell you, because that means I'm going to have to upset you. I hate this. I hate this mess I have made. You have children together. You two were perfect.

Alois; 'My balls hurt!'

Dear Malphas,

It's only been just over three weeks since we last had sex. A month isn't even that long. I'm doing fine. If you're in so much 'pain', then I suggest you take a little time off with your hand and relive yourself of the problem. Stop bitching at me, please. You're making my ears hurt. Four days left. I can do this, for sure and so can you. Oh, also... if you end up going to Ciel to fix your little problems, your balls wont be the only thing that hurts when I am done with you. 

Lots of love and kisses, Alois. 

Cambion; Right now, I am beyond happy. Yesterday, Keaira made me realise that Jack isn't really Jazz's twin brother that no one had ever heard of until after Jazz died. If you put all the little bits together, it made sense. How could I have not guessed it? Jack is only Jazz in a male form. To everyone else, she's going to remain as Jack. But to me, she'll switch into her female form, and I will address her as Jazz. We formed a contract in order to save my soul when I die. I wont have to suffer in hell. I honestly didn't really care if I were made to suffer, but I agreed to form a contract in order to keep her happy. If she wants to do me this favour, then I'm not going to say no to her. Everything will stay the same as before between me and Jazz. I'm not going to treat her like a slave, or order her around. The only thing that has changed is the seal on my wrist. I'm not even going to bother hiding it from anyone. Ciel said not to hide things from him, so I wont. He's not going to like it, but he'll get over it in time. It's not hurting him, he shouldn't care. 

I don't care about what anyone says or thinks about this pact I made. I'm just glad I got Jazz back. My Jazebel. That fleabag...

Elias; That trip down to the lake didn't quite go as planned, did it, Princess? I was hoping you wouldn't go into the water. I also hoped that you didn't get upset and start to cry. Of course, I am so mean, and nowadays I can't see you without making you shed  tears, isn't that right? It pains me to see you upset. I'm really sorry, but I still fail to see the reason that makes you say you hate me. You said it was because I was too strict. I worry about you too much, that's all. I fear for your safety. I refuse to let anything happen to someone else that means the world to me. If it wasn't for you, I would have left London a long time ago. I have a job to do that requires me to keep moving. Staying here with you though doesn't sound too bad. I guess I'll just have to hope for the best. 


'I am no model figure.'


There were a few things that happened yesterday that surprised me. First off, I didn't expect to throw my camera in the lake  just to show you that I care about your happiness rather than luxury items that can be easily replaced. You can't be replaced. I'd rather keep you. The second thing that surprised me was when you kissed me. I didn't kiss back, but I also didn't push you away and the reason for that was because it made me very happy. I didn't return the kiss because I thought you'd tell me off for it. You're married now, I'm not allowed to kiss you. I accept it, it's not so much of a problem, but it does make me feel very guilty when you do things like that. Poor Nameless. He's such a sweet boy. I don't want to play a part in the heartbreak of someone else's relationship. The last thing was when you said you loved me. Again, I felt that pang of guilt, but I couldn't help but ask if I were allowed to say it back to you. You told me I could, so I did. I love you, Princess. I always will, even if you never leave Nameless. I'm not going to ask you to do that. Your happiness is far more important to me than my own.


'I come on shameless, but I am ashamed.'

Alois; Apparently Sebastian has finally had enough of Ciel and his pathetic behaviour and left. I say good for him. It's about time someone showed Ciel that he can't go on treating people like utter shit. I'd do it myself, but I do somewhat value my own life. Without Sebastian in the way though, I can tease and taunt him as much as I please. Sounds fun, doesn't it? 

Mello is a vampire. Are there really any humans around any more? I thought Mello was a human, but apparently not. Oh! I know... I'm a zombie, I just don't know it yet. There are angels, demons and vampires. I'm going to be different and be a zombie. I'll eat brains for lunch and dinner, and maybe some eyeballs for a snack... Crap, I need to think of something better to do with my day. Well, I'm off now to take Ajax out for a walk and maybe do a little blackberry picking for a certain someone, and maybe I'll have to hand feed him to make sure little mess is made. 

Cambion; Even if I didn't hate Lecea that much before, I can certainly say that I do now. What he did to Ciel, it makes me just so...angry. I remember showing Ciel my bottle of holy water once. He knew I wasn't going to cause him any harm, but he was still fearful nonetheless. I can only imagine how scared he must have been when Lecea attacked him with it. Ciel is strong, and I hardly ever see him show any fear, which is one of the reasons I look up to him so much, but to picture him in pain and terrified-.... Damn that child of his. He should consider himself very lucky that he has become immune to pain and holy items. So much would I love to sneak into his room at night while he sleeps. I'd look down on that pretty face of his that is so akin to that of his fathers; too bad that looks is the only thing they have in common. Ciel is a sweet loving person, whereas   Lecea is not. I'd pour the water over his face and watch as it scalds, burns and disfigures his features. At least then, his looks will reflect his personality. Lecea needs to be severely punished and as soon as I come up with a suitable form of punishment for him, I can guarantee I will take action.


Moving away from my anger... I woke up this morning with swollen eyes. I went ahead and followed through with what I said I was going to Jack; Jazz's twin brother, and save my crying until later. In all honesty, I thought that once I had started, I wouldn't stop. Again, I damn these human emotions. They never get any easier for me to adapt to. Keaira once said that the worst part of loving someone is losing them in the end, and the pain that follows after. It is that pain that makes me never want to fall in love, but can't help but wonder if that is what I am experiencing right now. I never felt this when Ansel, Aranis or Solange died. Sure, I may have been closer to Jazz then the rest of them, but I never thought losing someone would hurt this much.   That annoying nagging voice in the back of my head needs to go away. She was nothing more than a close friend, and that is what she only ever would have been, if she were still here. I did not 'love' her. It's impossible, for I am the vile heartlessness and I will never be able to love another. I do miss you, Jazz. I want you back. I'm sorry for betraying your trust.


'I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend but I always thought that I'd see you again.'

Elias;  I miss things being the way they used to be for us. 


On the bright side, I think I made a new friend yesterday. He has an air about him that reminds me of you. I don't know if that pleases, or upsets me.


I saw him again today. He gave me gifts. I'm very grateful Cross, thank you. They were lovely. We spoke about you, Princess. I need to take you down to the lake to feed the ducks. Maybe you'd like that, and you wont seem so angry at me anymore. Please, don't fall in though. I don't fancy taking a swim to fetch you out after. I'd love it if you'd both meet one day. I wont ask him again to find you. He...didn't like the idea that I wanted him to cheer you up because you're my ex. I don't see a problem with it. Is it wrong to want to bring two friends together? Oh, and don't worry Princess. No one could ever replace you.

Elias says; 'Don't be so damn hard on yourself. Yeah, you screwed up. You're not perfect, fine.. Learn from it, but don't punish yourself. Be kind to yourself when you screw up. You'll bounce back eventually. You'll make up for it.'